Man in the Shadows

Stop. Sit down. Strap this to your arm...Do you have any idea how much trouble you are in?
No?
Well you're in a lot of freakin trouble.
What did I do?!
Look at this photo.
Ok, that's me holding a beer at the beach.
Yes, but what beach?
Spring Beach.
Exactly. Spring Beach is a dry beach. He quickly makes note of something in his notebook. Next question. Shows another photo. What's this a picture of?
That's me and my mom.
Correct! Are you gay?
No, I just love my mom.
He makes some notes. Is this your phone?
Uhhh yea. How did you get that?
Huh, I took it out of your pocket when you weren't looking.
Why am I here?!
That's confidential...Based off of this interrogation, you are either bisexual or gay which could stem from your problem with authority.
Whaaaa? I'm not gay!
Not even a little bit?
No.
Do you want to get out of here?
No!